relax.

vacation was amazing. two and half weeks off replenished my soul like i can't even explain. before the wedding i felt like i could just loose it and harm someone at work. i would sleep and wake up tired. my home was a mess and life was just overwhelming me. but these past 17 days off have made me feel like a human again.

first was kyle and jen's wedding. what a beautiful bride and an amazing couple they make. everything basically went off without a hitch and we all had a lot of fun.

its so strange to think that my little brother is married ... is a husband ... has a wife ... has his own home ... it blows my mind actually! but i am so happy for them ... i love jen like a sister and friend ... they make just the best couple ... and i pray SO hard that they live the happily ever after. they both deserve it.

next up with our vacation. we spent a week in plum island and then 2 days in boston. we had a truly amazing time. we both needed to decompress and relax very badly. and once we did, we reconnected and had just the best time. we slept late, spent time on the beach, did a little exploring, ate like pigs, read, shopped, talked, planned ... boston was gorgeous and once again i dreamt about moving there. it's definately something that we talked about ... but moving so far from family and his theater just isn't an option unfortunately. but we loved the visit just the same.

i also had a lot of fun with my new camera (as if you couldn't tell! :p)

*sigh!* it was all heaven. the following week we bummed around, was extremely lazy (which felt SO decadent! and SO amazing!). i finished up my turtle Ami from the Roxycraft pattern ... and created my own pattern for a piggie. she still needs some tweaking ... but came out cute all the same.

i've hesitated signing up for the craft show this september because i don't have any vacation time left and i am unsure what my inventory will look like ... but dave encouraged me to do it ... so i think i will drop the check off today. a little nervous about that ... but ... well ... at least that gives me a goal.

i did a lot of life thinking these past 2 weeks. it's time i put aside any residual fears and start planning this wedding. my life seriously needs a little discipline. i need to loose some weight (stop eating SO MUCH garbage!!! you don't feel well afterwards anyway!!). i need to stop whining and just get things done. i need to relax at work and stop putting so much stress on myself. i just need a little structure. a little more focus. and maybe, somehow, a few more breaks from work to keep this perspective. i swear people would be more productive if they had a week off after every 6 or so weeks they worked. i know i would be. i was useless before kyle's wedding.

anyway ... i just want to work really hard at life. i don't want to overdo it ... but i just want to stop being so lazy and lamenting the fact that i never have time. i will be even busier when i have children ... i need to learn how to squeeze the most from a day now!!

i know it's only wednesday but i have spent a whole two days on my cleaning schedule. i am getting things done. i couldn't sleep anymore so, instead of laying in bed playing video games (which isn't bad SOME of the time ... but not ALL of the time), i got up, made coffee (still working on achieving that perfect cup ...), wrote this post and will crochet until i have to get in the shower. dave and i are eating at home. i am bringing lunch. i am watching my calories. i love love LOVE doing nothing, relaxing, etc ... but i crave a little structure. i blame my mom for that!!! :p

and i am doing a lot of thinking about my crafts ... and i really really want to work hard on them. i want to create a strong etsy presence ... i just have to figure out what direction to go in. but that is my goal for the rest of the year ... to really really focus and work hard to get this baby off the ground!!! :o)